SWORDFERN
Rooted, I used to think.

Profile - Archive - Photos
Guestbook - Email - Diaryland

Leaving - Sunday, Jun. 28, 2009
Number Four: Ben - Monday, Jun. 22, 2009
The Excuse - Sunday, Jun. 21, 2009
Photos Early Summer 2009 - Friday, Jun. 19, 2009
Dave, again and again. - Thursday, Jun. 18, 2009


Sunday, Jun. 28, 2009 @ 8:47 am
Leaving



We went up to the dump yesterday, to drop off some photo chemicals and cordless drill batteries. We drove up that long, steep road that I drove every morning, and I could hear the song that I heard every morning, never bothering to change the CD because it just seemed to be the right sound track every time.

I saw the same men that worked there last summer - the only woman now a mother. And I saw her, my replacement, with long brown hair and an open freckled face. Her legs long in dirty jeans. She was bagging the stuff, using the system that I invented. She had more flowers than I had. Either I convinced them that it was a good idea, or else she was better at convincing them to outlay the capital costs. Huge pottery planters, massive hanging baskets - oh, the misery of my two plastic pots filled with on-sale annuals. Paid for by me, me afraid to submit the receipts for the $80, for my selfish desire to surround myself with something beautiful in the manufactured wasteland of the landfill.

She seemed happier than I was. I wonder if I was that good at pretending.

The apartment is boxed. We collected boxes from the liqueur store, the grocery store, the cardboard dumpster behind the college. I choose my clothes for the next two months - three shirts, two pants, a pile of underwear. We won't be in one place long enough for anyone to notice my repetitive wardrobe.

I didn't go drinking with the class after exams. Instead, I packed. Ready to move, to move on. My heart breaks to never see them again.

So, this is over, this island life. I have lived on an island for 30 months.

And now, we're moving North.


Roots | Shoots