SWORDFERN
Rooted, I used to think.

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Purgatory - Sunday, Feb. 10, 2019
Day Fifteen - Saturday, Feb. 09, 2019
Day Fourteen - Saturday, Feb. 09, 2019
Day Thirteen - Thursday, Feb. 07, 2019
Atonement - Thursday, Feb. 07, 2019


2002-04-13 @ 2:34 p.m.
Sanctified



So the boys had a gig last night. It was pretty much the usual set of the same songs. And the same groupies. And (ex)Dave putting his arm around me and telling me that we should hang out sometime. It's strange, that group of friends. I only see them every month or so, but I still consider them my main 'group'. I sat there last night, drinking a pint that was definitely valued correctly at $2.50, and I realized that I had nothing to say to any of the girls that were there. All four of them (our group is rather heavy on the XY chromosome set). The guys I can chit-chat with, but the girls don't do that. It's like since I don't call them and talk for hours on the phone that I don't like them. But I don't mind sitting by myself and just observing how the drunk people interact. (ex)Dave will always come to talk... and the guys that don't know me stare at Dave.. wondering who this girl is he's got his arm around...

I nearly laughed out loud when we were all dancing to the band. I was right beside this girl that I know Dave has been trying to hook up with. I saw him come over... and then just turn around and go sit by himself. He didn't know who to dance with! If he gave attention to me, he'd lose her attention, and vice versa! haheheheh

I got home from the bar, and had my usual 2am post-drinking icq conversation with this guy I know from 1st year. I was telling him about the farm.. and he mentions "No, actually overalls can be sexy on the right girl. I think they'd probably look really good on you." Nice. Since the first day I met him, I knew he was the type of guy I want to date... but he's been with his girlfriend for 4 years now... and so i trust his opinion on things... just when I thought that wearing overalls was utterly frumpy.

Walking between the barns this morning, a bald eagle circled and soared away up high. Its wingspan was immense... it's hard to imagine what it would be like to be really close to one. The eagle reminded me of last night.. I jogged as the sun was setting.. into the woods. It was much darker than I'd thought it was going to be. There was this feeling, though. Perhaps it was the CD I'd take - alternative mix of Linkin Park, Incubus, and Sum41- definitely NOT my normal anti-mainstream selections. But good nevertheless. The somewhat dark and angry music put me on edge. Dark trails.. dark music. It felt like a movie.. girl jogging in woods at night with sketchy music.. and then there was a silent shadow that exploded infront of me. Feathers brushed my face and I finally focused in on an brown striped wings and a raptor-like shape against the sky between the trees. It settled onto a limb, and its head twisted and turned around in near-complete circles. An owl. It scared me; I scared it. It's wings brushed my face. It must mean something. Sanctified in my kind of cathedral.


Roots | Shoots