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Purgatory - Sunday, Feb. 10, 2019
Friday, Aug. 27, 2004 @ 12:03 am
I'm explaining to him what I'm looking for...
"Needy vs. Supportive:
When two needy people come together they are like a positive and a negative wave - they cancel each other out and flatline. But when two people compliment and support each other they are like two positive waves, and they are additive, and they generate a superwave. A tsunami.
That's what I'm looking for. A tidal wave of love."
He says, "When I first met you I knew you were interesting. Some people you meet, you think OK, I could get along with this person. But you... I think I can learn a lot from you."
I confess to him, "I spent the last two and a half years being stubbornly independant. But inside I have been craving companionship and intimacy." And then I ask myself Have I ever really let someone inside of me?
He brings me flowers and rubs my back when I'm falling asleep. He puts his arm around me when we're out, showing possesion and care.
I like looking at him. I like how his face is asymmetrical. I like how I fit in beside him, my shoulder under his arm.
His nose is convex and mine is concave, and I imagine us lying with our faces upside-down to one another. I see our noses fitting together like puzzle pieces, nested like spoons, a cross-section of a ball-and-socket joint.
Joint, a link. Connection. I smile and he smiles and I hope that I never forget how it feels to be young and brilliant and falling in love.