Rooted, I used to think.

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Purgatory - Sunday, Feb. 10, 2019
Day Fifteen - Saturday, Feb. 09, 2019
Day Fourteen - Saturday, Feb. 09, 2019
Day Thirteen - Thursday, Feb. 07, 2019
Atonement - Thursday, Feb. 07, 2019

Friday, Sept. 20, 2002 @ 1:19 am
When I'm up I can't get down.

You know how it feels to be crushing so hard on someone... that just a brush of their sleeve sends you soaring.

That's how it is with co-worker crush.

It was another teamwork day. Endless banter. He leaned over beside me at one point, and the feel of his breath on my arm numbed my feet.

We went to the concert tonight. We went to a pub first, for drinks and appies. He met up with us after we sat down. He choose the seat beside me. Goddamnit he looked good.

On the way to the Orpheum he's looking me up and down. "Nice sock tan line!" he offers. He's looking at my legs. "Brian said you looked hot in that skirt today." Translation: "I think you look hot in that skirt, but I'll use Brian as a shield."

He was beside me for the whole concert. I was so happy then. Smiling away, dizzy with the yellow and blue lights, dancing, singing... his arm pushing against mine the entire time. So warm. It is nearly the hug I was asking for.

We stood on a street corner after the concert. The usual departing goodbye conversations that never end. Half the group left to carpool back to Surrey. I looked at him, and he read my mind. "You want a ride home?"

Three of us squished on the bench seat of his pick-up truck (pick me up, baby!) and of course, I got the middle seat. Thank God for standard transmissions... his hand brushed my leg every time he shifted gears.. ahahha hella sweet.

My oh my.

After dropping the 3rd wheel off, we continued through the dark, through the park, to the farm. I somehow managed a smooth transition of converstion to relationships. I asked about the deal between him and his WinnePeggy. "It's stupid. I don't know why we are even attempting to bridge this physical distance."

Alas, I will not be that other girl. But I will water and fertilize this friendship, trying to bring forth some sort of red blossoms from the evergreen leaves of a coworker.

As he drove off and I locked the gate behind me, he honked and waved. And he smiled.

Roots | Shoots